Our Neighbourhood Watch meetings are a real 'Dibley' treat. The Chairman is a retired Major with a couple of artificial limbs (think of the stereotype and then times it by 3) and the secretary is a prim looking lady in polyester who asks 'should I minute that' every few minutes; regular members include a retired policeman (who everyone defers to even when he's talking crap, he has his arms crossed and his feet up on the chair in front throughout the meeting!) a few retired couples who have been together so long they're more like conjoined twins who have been seperated, some other people that never ever say anything (I'm not even sure if they can all speak!) and me. I'm the youngest person (by a couple of decades) that turns up, which is a shame for lots of reasons. The first meeting I attended about a year ago I got the 'Slaughtered Lamb' reception from them all (you know that bit in 'American Werewolf' where the boys go into the pub ont' moors and everyone stops and stares at them until they leave) and it's still much the same but I don't care as I love it.
Anyway, the hot news this quarterly meeting was that the sign at the entrance to our estate has been savagely mown down by a mystery driver who hasn't been caught and no-one knows when the council will get around to fixing it; I must say I had wondered what had happened and now I know! Also the group are calling for speed cameras on one of the roads (yikes! not really in favour of that) and want to see more community policing - along with the rest of the country. On the upside there have been no reports of thefts from houses, cars, garages or sheds in the last quarter, phew we can all sleep a little more peacefully in our beds. The Chairman & Secretary were unanimously voted (by a system of Yeses and nods) to stay on in office for the next year, which suited everyone.
On the Churchy front the sermon was all about Jesus' humanity which was very interesting and linked up nicely with references to what made us all human - emotions and feelings for others versus Iraq and a missing child were topics for debate afterwards with a cup of tea and a shortbread biscuit.
Update: News Flash - There's to be a cake and plant stall next weekend to raise money for the Neighbourhood Watch so I'll be baking my famous (or is that infamous) Tea Loaf for the cake stall - and the recipe is secret so no amount of coaxing with home-made fairy cakes will make me part with it!
Anyway, the hot news this quarterly meeting was that the sign at the entrance to our estate has been savagely mown down by a mystery driver who hasn't been caught and no-one knows when the council will get around to fixing it; I must say I had wondered what had happened and now I know! Also the group are calling for speed cameras on one of the roads (yikes! not really in favour of that) and want to see more community policing - along with the rest of the country. On the upside there have been no reports of thefts from houses, cars, garages or sheds in the last quarter, phew we can all sleep a little more peacefully in our beds. The Chairman & Secretary were unanimously voted (by a system of Yeses and nods) to stay on in office for the next year, which suited everyone.
On the Churchy front the sermon was all about Jesus' humanity which was very interesting and linked up nicely with references to what made us all human - emotions and feelings for others versus Iraq and a missing child were topics for debate afterwards with a cup of tea and a shortbread biscuit.
Update: News Flash - There's to be a cake and plant stall next weekend to raise money for the Neighbourhood Watch so I'll be baking my famous (or is that infamous) Tea Loaf for the cake stall - and the recipe is secret so no amount of coaxing with home-made fairy cakes will make me part with it!
4 comments:
Hiya Liz,
I've had to open a Google account in order to send you a comment. I don't even know what a Google account is or what I'll do with it now I've got it.
Really enjoyed reading the blog but was very concerned about the street sign crisis. Might it be possible - between you and the rest of the Neighbourhood Watch Crew - to mount some sort of nightly patrol to deter would - be offenders? Perhaps you should propose this at the next meeting.
Peace
jd
For those of you concerned about the street sign crisis I've taken one suggestion (for the Neighbourhood Watch Crew to hold an overnight patrol to deter would-be offenders) very seriously indeed and will be proposing this at the next meeting.
Many thanks and peace,
Lizbee x
Do the married couples wear matching patterned jumpers and finish each other's sentences? Sounds great. Did you hear on the news last night that a Chief Constable has suggested that we might be too watched? A small crime-free village in Hampshire has put in CCTV and I think that was the final straw for him.
Not the same jumpers no, but they are definitely colour co-ordinated, you can tell they've checked wardrobes to ensure they complement each other! But Yes.. they.. finish.. each others.. sentances.
And we are definitely too watched particularly on cities... I've been inside the CCTV suites and it's incredible they can see what book you're reading, view tickets sticking out of your pocket, if they can lip read too...!
By the way I love your little waving flag Liz.
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